I'll explain what the hell that embarrassment was needed for shortly, but rest assured it was necessary (unless I wanted to drop the front crossmember, or pull the intake and exhaust manifolds).
Before I get too far ahead, I want to make it clear that this process is entirely undocumented. I found next to no forum discussions, articles, videos, or anything else that explained how the hell to get this job done. Just look at what the TSM says on the subject:
I suspect the first draft was the same format and character count, with all the words replaced with "ha ha ha ha".
Last detail before I get started: since my CV axles exploded several months ago, they've been deleted and replaced with axle stubs through the wheel hubs.
If you still have functioning 4WD, you'll need to unbolt your CVs from the axle flanges and hang them from the subframe. I don't know what impact that will have on clearance, but I imagine it would be a lot. If you have old CVs laying around, you might want to consider separating the stubs and using those as stand-ins while replacing the mounts. This isn't a documented and verified practice, so who knows what demons you're tempting by going that route. In my case, it worked fine.
Whatever you decide, DO NOT just remove the CVs and leave the hubs empty. You're risking wheel separation and a painful maiming/death if you decide to do that. So with all this said, I'll get to the point.
When replacing either mount, you should loosen the center cushion stud nut of the opposite mount. This allows the engine assembly to pivot and the brackets of the mount you're working on to separate. You can use a floor jack to lift the engine from a point closest to the mount you're replacing, similar to what the TSM mentions.
The right side is fairly straightforward; lift, separate, and replace. I needed a prybar to get the last little bit of clearance, but that was all.
The left side. Well, the left side is a cruel and disgusting monster that cares for your feelings only enough to want to crush them. It hates you. It hates your friends. It hates anyone who has ever shared a passing glance with you. It sucks.
To slay this dragon, the Eagle was put up on ramps. You should consider any approach that you feel would be safer when using a floor jack (or hoist) to lift the engine. This side of the engine can't be raised high enough to extract the mount cushion before the top of the right axle contacts the frame, which causes the spread of the mount brackets to hit a dead stop.
Lucky for you, getting the left side replaced doesn't require a full removal of the axle assembly. That's about where your luck runs out, though. See, the axle assembly is mounted to the block by way of three brackets, one on the right and two on the left sides of the block. The forward left bracket is the upper engine mount bracket, which also bolts into the top of the front diff. The rear left bracket has two bolts fixed into mounting bosses on the block, and two bolts affixing the bracket to the front diff pinion housing (all of these bolts are 5/8 hex, and using six-point sockets is highly advised).
This is really interesting when compared to the bracket on the right, which uses only a single bolt and nut pair to couple the bracket to the right axle and support bar (which attaches to the bellhouse near the starter). The way this is designed, the left connecting fasteners can be removed and the right support bar and bracket bolt and nut pairs loosened to allow the right bracket to act as a hinge. Doing this will let the front diff drop downward on the left side as it pivots on the right bracket's bolt.
Getting to that point, however, is much easier said than done.
To access the bolts on the left, you'll first need to remove the sheet steel that is formed as a dust shield above the left axle. This is your introductory point to what kind of madness you're about to face. It's fastened directly to the subframe rail by a fine thread, 3/4 head, self-tapping bolt, which is about 2" long and secured with blue thread lock down roughly half its length. I found nothing else to be connected to it, but I suspect it also acts as a talisman that keeps some sort of horrible evil at bay. Remove it to gain access to the pinion support bracket.
Separate the pinion support bracket from the block by removing the topmost bolts, then remove the lower two bolts that connect to the diff. This bracket will need to be removed to access the fender-side bolt that fastening the mount bracket to the top of the diff.
Before moving on to the remaining two bolts, remind yourself to check and make sure you have the diff supported from below.
Once confirmed, remove the fender-side bolt and find every extension you have to create the beast in the first picture in this post. Pay attention to where the universal adapter is, as well as the wobble extensions. Believe it or not, these are important details. Though the articulated head on the 1/2 driver wasn't necessary, it did help.
To free the remaining diff bolt (the one closest to the block), feed your extension chain through the top of the narrow space between the intake and exhaust manifolds, just in front of the runner for cylinder 4. Cuss, beg, and plead with the fates to allow the socket to seat on the bolt head, and have someone steady the extension while you turn the whole assembly with a breaker bar. Here's a picture to demonstrate (note the location of the socket, circled in red):
Once this last fastener is free, you can lower the diff and place a wood block/specialty tool above it, aligned in such a way as to contact the bottom of the bracket you just removed the bolts from. Then you can raise the diff with the jack and lift the engine on the specially tool enough to swap the mount cushion. It may be worth noting that the 2x4 we used as our specialty tool broke during the last jack pump, so be careful.
Order of installation is reverse of removal, though the tears of despair can't be taken back.
EDIT: Even though you'd be wise to suspect otherwise, this is not an April fool's joke. This is far too painful a subject to joke around with.
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